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  • Cathy Selene Kay

Home Is Where My Stuff Is?



The Fall Equinox arrived and a new season of change blew purposefully through my life: I moved homes in July after nearly 17 years of living and loving and learning in the Beachwood Canyon neighborhood of Hollywood Hills in Los Angeles. As of October I am officially a mere 10 minute drive east to my new home, but it feels like I’ve moved a lifetime away – and in essence I have:

I gave away almost all and sold what was left of my beloved furniture; I donated two-thirds of my wardrobe, household goods, decor and miscellaneous belongings to charity. All these “things” made me feel superficially secure and connected to a physical space in the world that I could claim as mine; all these things artfully arranged, organized and displayed to help my material world express who I am were suddenly memories in my mind and in some photographs.

It’s been more of a shock to those who know me well than to myself that I actually left. They all know that I experienced moving 40+ times during the first 18 years of my life. It was no mystery then why I nailed down roots as soon as I had the chance: My things in their place, in my private space, represented belonging and permanence even though what I identified with most was actually constant change.

Meanwhile as an adult I’ve had the privilege of traveling to other parts of the world and living in another country: I’d often come home to the realization that my actual “home” was more about where the majority of my stuff was (friends, family, pets, etc. aside). Being away for an extended period of time also makes it easy to see how very little we need.


So after all that release of even the most desirables, what I chose to keep still filled every possible and available square inch of a 16 foot truck. All together it took 6 people to load-in and out, 4 of whom were strong, professional movers. Still everyone was exhausted and in awe that such a petite person would have so much. So I kept on letting go, creating more and more space:

For instance I now digitize most paperwork and other similar clutter-makers, and keep only the most valuable of things if it is actually useful or necessary for my life right now. Sentimentality still has its place, but only keeping that which continues to inspire vs. holding on to the past. It feels grrrrrrreat.

There is energy tied to everything and the old adage proves true: When you release you make room to receive. The abundance that has flowed into and through my life again and ever since has been life-affirming, bringing to mind sweeping metaphors such as ‘travel light to travel far’…

Making space for myself allows more space for others to create and explore more, too – with me, through me and supported by me as a friend, family, partner, therapist, citizen and all-around bliss-advocate. Therefore I make a conscious effort to take this to heart and action whenever I resist letting go of that “thing” that takes up more energetic space than it is giving back.

So as the 2012 to 2013 countdown begins, cheers to more space for more bliss!


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